Gardener Commandant

So, about a week ago I rolled out one of those “instant gardens” in my flower box. You know-you roll it out, water it twice a day, wait a while and you get a bunch of beautiful flowers. Well, I am obsessed with it. I’m also very impatient. And a total dork. I’m treating these poor sprouts like a drill sergeant: “Come on you little bastards! Let’s grow! Lock ‘n’ load you shitheads! This ain’t no girlie tea party! I wanna see some flowers you useless turds!” I do not think this has improved their progress…


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